Pride

Our lesson in Sunday School (everybody knows what Sunday School is, don't they?) yesterday was about pride. How it goeth before a fall. How it's a bad thing in any degree. How you're only supposed to boast of your weaknesses . . . that sort of thing.

Well, I have had a revelation about that and piping. Not a Lightening Strike revelation. Instead, it's one of those revelations that come along, bit by bit. This could be because I just don't get it the first time, and have to keep getting the next chapter, which includes a summary of what happened the chapter before . . . That's just my speed.

So here's the revelation:

a) If . . . well actually, when . . . I practice, I improve.

b) When I improve, I start to think who in band I'm better than (pride) . I even go so far as to think of mistakes other people have made that I didn't make (at the time). (Of course I made them in the next tune . . .but we won't go into that.)

c) As soon as I start with the pride thing, I start to mess up. I make stupid mistakes that I may even have just practiced myself out of. Or it could be mistakes that I haven't made since the very beginning.

d) This humbles me back into not thinking I'm such a great piper, so I practice more.

It's a vicious circle, not one prone to much advancement.

What I really need is to not even go to b) (pride) in the first place. Maybe only compare myself to myself, and not to other pipers. How, though? I have to listen to everybody else so as to be playing the same thing at the same time as the rest of the band. Where I have to put the block is right there, at listening. Don't go any further. Don't make any judgements, just take in information. I don't know how to build that dam. I'm only partially good at mashed potato dams!

Anyway, I did partially good at practicing this week, only missing Friday and Sunday. But I also missed my lesson on Thursday due to a schedule conflict with Relief Society.

This week I have:

Wednesday: band practice

Thursday: Group lesson

Friday: band practice

Saturday: band practice AND Concert.

Sunday: day off.


Ugh.